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Friday, April 13, 2007

The Last Word.

Ever tried to not think about something? If I tell you not to think about your mother, doesn't her saintly smile immediately come to mind? The subject arises as I sit here in the early morning hours of the last day of my 35 years at Channel 13. (Station big-wigs prefer that I use "brands" like "ABC13" or "Houston's News Leader." But no-one has ever asked me to tell them about my job at "Houston's News Leader." They always ask about "Channel 13.") Since announcing my retirement three weeks ago at this very spot in cyberspace, I've been asked more than a few times what my final words will be. During all these years, like everyone else, I've ended each broadcast with an implied, if not spoken, "tune in tomorrow." This time, there's no tomorrow. It's final, terminal, the last hurrah. I've always tried to be as spontaneous as possible. Anything I've said that is memorable probably popped into my mind while Marvin Zindler was talking or during a commercial break or during the huddle Dave Ward makes us form in the middle of the studio floor during the last five minutes of World News Tonight. Just kidding). Seriously, I don't really want to plan what to say or do. It's too late for the Marlene McClinton thing. Besides, I'm not in a position where I want or need to burn any bridges. There's no way I'm clever enough to challenge Henry Luce. According to one totally impeachable source, his final words were: "It's Time, Life!" For a weatherman, the temptation is to issue one final, all-encompassing forecast that makes future weather casts unnecessary. Something like: Sunny days occasionally interrupted by a variety of cloud patterns producing, at times, different forms of precipitation from tomorrow until the end of time." No, that won't work. Not teasable. Maybe I need a better "ultimate forecast." Or a phrase with few words and multiple meanings on several levels. Maybe I need something that will last through the ages. Any ideas?
Of course, I could just wave.

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